It is no surprise to anybody that I believe that God is walking around disguised as a black woman and preaches to me everyday at 4pm on ABC. To many people she is Oprah Winfrey but to me she is my decision maker. When Oprah tells me to buy a book, I buy 4. When she tells me something is delicious I order it in bulk. When she tells me to make the connection I do and try to hire Bob Greene to train me. Imagine my surprise when I saw Oprah's BFF outside of Saturday Night Live last weekend. I thought I had ran into my own long lost best friend. It was like I knew everything about Gayle. The first thing I asked for was a photo. Obviously I wanted proof that I had actually gotten to meet Gayle since Oprah has been ditching me and not listening to my show ideas since I was 4. I figured now I was able to give her my opinion.
Anyhow, I then proceeded to pester Gayle for tickets to the Oprah Show! I wanted to know how I have been calling the ticket hot line religiously since I was 12 to get tickets to the show with no luck. I honestly believe I would have a better chance cracking pi than getting tickets to Oprah. Gayle told me to call the ticket hot line. I looked at her like, "Wow! Thanks Captain Obvious!" I then proceeded to pull out my phone and show her that, Oh yes!, I had Oprah's ticket hot line programmed into my cell phone. That's right! Oprah's ticket hot line is programmed into my cell under Oprah. If I can't get tickets than who can? Gayle laughed and proceeded to walk to her car and told me to keep trying. Seriously Gayle you are her best friend! You should get me a spot sitting on Oprah's lap for a show!
No comments:
Post a Comment